on spouses

I didn’t run today.

But in the interest of not alienating my 14 readers, I thought I’d call it quitsies on the complaining and talk about something else that’ll make you roll your eyes.

Spouses.

I don’t talk about my husband a lot on the blog because frankly, I think it’s kind of annoying when people go on and on about the huz, the DH, the hubby, hubbykins, weegie, shmoopie, pookie and any number of other absurd and emasculating names you people you come up to refer to your significant others.

I may refer to him in passing: my husband thinks you’re stupid; my husband is really into zombies; my husband bailed me out of jail last night; but since I’ve really made an effort to shift the focus of this blog away from the MEMEME daily life (yeah right) and instead concentrate on just the running and the beer parts, ye olde lifemate has taken a backseat, blogwise.

But that doesn’t mean he’s taken a backseat in life. (Unless we’re fooling around in the backseat. Heh.)

It’s one thing if your significant other has requested not to be mentioned on the blog. In this age of social media retardation, you can’t be too careful.

Also, some of you have come up with this neat naming convention so that we know who you’re talking about when you say “HubbyDave” bought you flowers, or “HubbyDave” ran a marathon or “HubbyDave” slept with your brother.

And that’s cool.

But my husband is the private type. He’s not a blogger. He’s not a Facebooker. He doesn’t tweet. Hell, he’s not even really an e-mailer or a phone answerer. He only recently got into texting after realizing it’s a neat way to avoid talking to people. And I sort of love that about him. After all, there’s only room in this family for one fame whore.

Buuuut he does say some pretty funny shit sometimes; and since he’s never going to tell you about it, I came up with this segment, Shit My Husband Says. Also, it makes for a nice go-to post when I’m not running or (god forbid) not drinking.

So without further ado, your latest installment of SMHS.

Regarding meet-ups with your blog friends:

“Some day one of these people is going to turn out to be a serial killer. And when you’re lying there dead, I’m going to say ‘I told you so.’ Except really I’ll be saying it to myself because you’ll be dead.”

Read previous installments of Shit My Husband Says.